16 Barber Jokes & Puns to Make You Laugh

Being a barber can be difficult. From cutting messy thick hair to cleaning up a food-embezzled beard — nothing comes easy as an everyday barber. However, we have compiled a list of some fantastic jokes and puns about barbers. You’ll love them, we promise you’ll get the LOLs.

Barber Jokes & Puns to Make You Laugh

  1. A dude goes to the barber for a new trim. Barber: “How would you like your hair today?” Dude “Look, i want this side all but completely shaved, with this 2 spots here bald, this side, shorn, and in the middle do as you please.” Barber: “I am sorry, but i think that would be too hard to do.” Dude “How did you do it last week then?”

  2. How did the barber win the race? He knew a shortcut.
  3. What’s barber’s favourite function on a Windows PC? The shortcut.
  4. A DJ and a barber got into an argument. It was odd, because they both loved to fade.
  5. Why did the barber rub diaper rash cream into his customer’s scalp Because he believed that “what’s good for the gooch is good for the dander!”
  6. My son stated that he don’t like going to the barber’s shop anymore! He says they are always looking down on him.
  7. My barber is so supportive. He’s constantly telling me to keep my head up.
  8. Steven Spielberg walks into a barber. “I’ll have the director’s cut!”
  9. What did the customer say to the barber? “I mustache you a question, but I’ll shave it for later!”
  10. I tried hitting on my barber the other day. I walked in and asked “Hey, do you comb hair often?”
  11. What did the barber say to the overly talkative customer? “Cut the chit-chat and let me trim!”
  12. How did the barber win the lottery? He knew how to make every cut count!
  13. Why did the barber bring a ladder to work? To give his customers a high and tight haircut!
  14. What do you call a barber who can cut hair while juggling? A sheer magician!
  15. A man walks in to Peters and Son barber shop. He asks the barber, “You Bob Peters?” “No we just cut hair.”
  16. An idiot, a barber, and a bald man go on a journey… At some point in the journey, they decide to set up camp for the night, so they agree to stay awake in four hour shifts to guard their stuff. The barber, having the first shift, gets bored and so ends up shaving the idiot’s head. When his shift ends, he wakes up the idiot, who has the second shift. As he’s coming to, the idiot rubs his head and finds he has no hair. “That barber is a right moron!” he exclaims, “He’s got it all wrong and woken the bald man instead of me!”
Abbie Wilson
Abbie Wilson has years of experience in the DIY & construction field having covered roofing, plumbing, and general DIY for various award-winning publications.

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